I miss having support.
But I don't know what I would do with it if I had it.
I'm so sealed off and I'm not sure anyone else will ever get in.
I'm still dreaming of countries I have never been to and people I have yet to meet but the thought of actualizing it terrifies me. It's a lot harder to come back than it is to leave in this situation. We shall see what happens. Still planning a trip March 19th-29th but... I don't know when I will solidify and commit to that.
I need rain. I need accents. I need adventure in places unknown. I've spent my life in the states and I'm honestly done. I know there are gorgeous places I have yet to visit but I feel no draw to them. Nothing at all.
I don't understand it and most of the time, I wish I didn't feel it. It tugs and pulls and it physically hurts.
I don't know."At the end of the day, you wait for the rain and I... I chase the storm."